Tucked Away in My Heart | That Whole Afternoon

ek akeli chchatri mei jab
aadhey aadhey bheeg rahey the
aadhey sookhey aadhey geeley
sookha to mei ley aayi thi
geela man shayad bistar ke paas para ho
vo bhijwa do
mera vo saamaan lauta do...


...echoes in my ear as I stand there in the balcony of my 8th floor room, overlooking the slightly curved expanse of the Atlantic Ocean.


The fragrance of the zero-caffeine barley coffee wafts up to my nostrils, and I stand there, looking at the ocean, but seeing you and me driving around in your limited edition silver SUV, singing along to this, one of our favorite songs. The song is sad, but our hearts are light. The context is somber, but cupid and his angels are dancing around us. We know we may well be singing this song in the real context soon, but right now is what matters to both of us...


You squeeze my hand lightly and jest "Thank God for automatic drives. At least I can hold your hand while we drive!" We look at each other and smile. I say "Yeah, but there's no eyes on your ears, so you've got to look ahead and drive." You laugh out. I join in. I settle back into my seat and close my eyes, only to feel your big, soft palm gently caress my cheek. I sigh. Aah, the simple pleasures of life with you.


I feel a gentle breeze on my face standing in the balcony and I know somewhere you're thinking of me too. We've always had this funny connection of thinking about each other at the same time....we've connected at the same moment enough times to not question it any more.


The rumble of the sea brings me back to the dhaba where we stop to have tea and end up eating their delicious daal -paronthe...the delicious smell of the tempering is making my stomach rumble and my mouth water. I look at you and you signal the server-cleaner-rolled-into-one and say, "two each of daal and aloo pronthe". Soon as the food reaches the table, we both dig in, "diet be damned" you mumble with your mouth full :) We polish off the food and drink up the syrupy sweet masala chai, put the glasses down on the table with an "ewww" and a grimace and looking at each other's expressions burst out laughing. Aah, the simple joys of life with you.


I stare out and the sun is beginning its journey west. I feel a gust of wind push at me and am back in the car. It's beginning to drizzle and I look at you gleefully. You push a button and the sunroof slides open. I stand up and shoot through it, spread my hands out and turn my face up to catch the raindrops. I feel your hand on the small of my back to steady me. I slowly lower myself back into my seat. You look at me gently and point to the seat belt. I reach out and kiss your forehead first. Aah, the simple glow of loving you.


I take a sip at my zero-caffeine "coffee" and turn around. The room's empty. I'm all alone.


Aah, the subtle ache of life without you.