Drenched

'twas a cool breeze that tugged at me
pulling me out of my confines
to under a dark, naked sky
Here were the clouds pouring forth
There I was, heart filled with mirth
They swirled, I twirled,
They raged, I engaged
They pranced, I danced
Until we were both completely spent
They were wrung dry
and I, I was, to the very core of my being,
Drenched - with God's love and nature's endless joy - drenched!

I leave...

As without a backward glance,
I tiptoe out toward the sea,
I leave behind the daughter,
The sibling, the woman,
The essence that was me.

Rain...

stretched out on tiptoe in my balcony,
the rain kissing my eyes.
goosebumps gifted by the breeze,
aah, an invitation to a million sighs

Sunset

The grim silhouette
As the sun went down 
The poignant moment
Raised yet, myriad hopes.
~SB

Seaside Memory

The pregnant swell of the wave,
delivering to the shore,
A universe of possibilities.
Oh! Child-like delight
At the treasure I found...
It lives on, in the depths of my memory.

Stairway to Heaven?

I am Nike

I fly high up
My hair whippping the wind
The reins held tight
My head held high
A smile spread across
That becomes
The twinkling in my eye.

Steering my chariot
Over every turning stone
over every rolling green
Faster, I ride
Robbing everything else of steam.

And now, for a moment
Before I take up the reins again,
For yet another victory
With an inward smile
that brings me joy
I remind myself
I am - Nike!

In Greek mythology, Nike (Greek: Νίκη , pronounced [níːkɛː], meaning Victory), was a goddess who personified triumph throughout the ages of the ancient Greek culture. The Roman equivalent was Victoria. Depending upon the time of various myths, she was described as the daughter of Pallas (Titan) and Styx (Water), and the sister of Cratos (Strength), Bia (Force), and of Zelus (Rivalry). Nike and her siblings all became described as attendants of Zeus when his cult gained the position of the dominant deity of the Greek pantheon and the roles of older deities were changed in new myths. According to classical (later) myth, Styx brought them to Zeus when the god was assembling allies for the Titan War against the older deities. Nike assumed the role of the divine charioteer, a role in which she often is portrayed in Classical Greek art. Nike is seen with wings in most statues and paintings. Most other winged deities in the Greek pantheon had shed their wings by Classical times. Nike is the goddess of strength, speed, and victory. Nike was a very close acquaintance of Athena, goddess of wisdom.[1] Nike is one of the most commonly portrayed figures on Greek coins.[2] Names which have sourced from the goddess Nike include Nicholas, Nick and Nicola.

Me Inside I

...I dove into the depths of me

To find shivering ecstacy

Buried under icy fear since aeons past

When suddenly there was a blast

A blast that threw me, ripped me apart

But finally joined me with me.

And now with new wings I fly

Away beyond the shimmering sunset sky

No longer afraid, no longer shy,

Able to say this is me,

Hark now, world, here am I.

Can I Want for More With...

Snowflakes lazily drifting towards the ground,
kissing treetops on the way;
A sunbeam merrily dancing through the clouds,
reminding me it's still broad day;
Sweet chirps of birds in perfect harmony,
lifting my heart, yet make it stay;
The gentle roar of a gushing, milky waterfall,
taking my breath away...

A beasty feast

Ripped Buttons
Released emotions

Closed eyes
Screamed sighs
Tender tips
Swollen lips
A shiver here
A tremble there
To excite
A naughty bite
In the dip
A tickliy nip

A tantalizing feast
Courtesy the beast

Tucked Away in My Heart - Comfort

Walking to get nowhere, steps aimlessly falling upon parched ground, I pull my shawl a little closer, and for some inexplicable reason I think of you.

Nonu, I think of each time that I grew sad, how you would comfort me and have me smiling in no time at all. Like this one time when I was bothered by the sight of an itsy bitsy pup being run over by an insensitive jerk on the road, who probably fancied himself to be Schumacher. You’d seen the look on my face and driving with one hand, you reached out and hugged me with the other. I still remember the sudden stop you’d made, looked at me with your puppy dog eyes and said, “I hate to leave you right now, but leave you I must”. My heart had lurched at that. Not necessarily the best thing to say at that moment! I’d held on to the dashboard of the car as if for dear life and till my knuckles went white. I actually heard myself exhale with relief as I saw you walking back. And the smile when you came back, and with “I know this doesn’t bring back the puppy to life, but…” handed me a box of Cadbury’s Nutties – my ALL time favorite - and a small card with an adorable pup on it that said, “I love you”. Oh the rush of emotions – still as strong as it was then…no, the shiver was NOT because of the super high air-conditioning. It was a tremble of love…of being loved…

Oh there were so many times that you comforted me – with a look, a smile, a song, a hug…only today the incidents, they seem to be eluding the grasp of my fingers groping through the maze of my memories.

Why today? I reach into the corner of my heart looking for you because today I’m sad. There’s mayhem in the world. Our country burns. It's not a puppy anymore. It is people. A friend of a friend has perished in the fire and it seems too close. A renowned person died and it’s almost as if a friend did – the thought that I’ll never be able to read of her again is too much to bear – for me. I think of her family and a tear escapes the confines of my eyes. People just names and numbers to me, but vivid as life to their families are now but frames on walls; memories frozen in pictures, but melting away in tears.

I sigh, turn around, looking for you. I stretch my hand out – as if to touch you. You’re not there.
I don’t know where you are, I don’t know how you are. One time I sent you a hello on an old email ID that sent me a reply: ‘Fatal error. This user does not exist”. I searched the ever expanding World Wide Web frantically for your company. It did not exist anymore. The world had indeed widened. Only, mine had suddenly become so small it was threatening to choke me.

At the memory, a sigh of futility finds its way through lips clamped shut. Muscles give way in shoulders held back, a reverberation in a head held high. For the briefest of moments, I close my eyes.

And it strikes me - separation is death, death is separation.

And for every single being alive suffering from either, there is no comfort.

Passion

Little buds of goosebumps on her dusky skin
A quiet indicator of what she is feeling.

A little flushed, a little rushed
Smiling, head shaking, her voice hushed.

Neck tilted, lashes lowered,
An escaped sigh, her desire smoldered.

How hard she tries, a breeze wanton,
There is no hiding this unbridled passion.

Poliics, sholitics

Would you agree we have far too many politicians in this world creating far too much mayhem everywhere?

Would you agree we don't need more of them?

Well, then you would agree that friendship is a bloody bad place to play politics in. The results are still the same - for furthering one's own end, they play politics. They don't care who gets hurt in the bargain...it's all about [perceived] power. It's all about divide and rule. It's all about 'i'm no past my prime yet. DOn't ignore me for someone new'.

Aah, this world would be a much simpler place if we took relationships for what they were - an independent series of transactions between two people....even in a group of three. It is possible. I have been there, done that. When we introduce our friends to our other friends, we should allow them to have independent relationshps - that's what I've always believed and tried to practice too, to a large extent....i'd actually say for the most part. Sure, there are timkes when it feels like, 'hey, we were friends first', but then sanity takes hold, I shrug my shoulders and find my corner to sulk, before bounding back to the center of the room and hold court once again!

Ok, so I got carried away a little in the last bit, but hey, i'm sure you got my drift.

Thanks for the listening ear. Now you can go think in your corner and come back here if you'd like to add anythign!

Tucked Away In My Heart - Laughter

And the laughter. What laughter ….just thinking about it is making me smile.

He has this deep belly laugh. Sync that with his baritone and the combination is rich enough to make you forget your blues when he laughs. Pair that up with my roaring laughter and people would surely turn around to want to be part of something truly hilarious…even if we were laughing at some silly little private joke.

There was this one time (of the very few that we met) when we wanted coffee and went to a popular chain of coffee stores – mind you this is still a time when “drinking coffee” at “coffee bars” was a fashion statement and the very “with it” thing to do. So here’s this couple sitting there, - obviously us – and obviously moony about each other, and they’re talking away very prim and proper – nineteen to the dozen, obviously exploring each other’s thought processes and all that, till something catches the girl’s attention. She starts with a small giggle, the guy leans towards her and says something which has her snorting and then moving on into her “I’d like to shake the world with my mirth” kind of laughter. Seeing her, he starts to smile. Then she says something that tickles his funny bone and before people have had a chance to roll their eyes at the “unsavviness” of it all, they’re both in gales of laughter!

A few people smiled – that is what laughter is supposed to do – really – a few grimaced – ‘very impropah, I tell you’ – I almost heard them say – but I couldn’t care less, could I? I was laughing, with the man I loved….and mother of all, loved me right back….it showed in his eyes, it showed in his tenderness, it showed in his protectiveness, most of all, it showed – loud and bl*&^%$ clear – in his carefree laughter.

Masks...

n, a deceptive outward appearance, syn. cloak, color, coloring, cover, disguise, disguisement, facade, face, false colors, front, gloss, guise, masquerade, pretense, pretext, semblance, show, veil, veneer, window-dressing...

This one's been my nemesis for all my life. I wear my heart on my sleeve...err, face, and find it very difficult to see through when what a person is saying is not what they mean, when what they're showing as their "feelings", their "best intentions for you" are not as honest and sincere as they sound.

Did i just evoke an incredulous "what?!?", "come ON, you can't be that naive", "oh please", "helloooo, open your eyes", or even a stare with an imperceptible shake of the head and an inaudible tut-tut from you? Well, those are some of the normal reactions I get from people who remind me - sometimes subtly, sometimes not as gently - that I am a fool for getting taken in by people.

Either that, or the truth of the matter reveals itself a little later.

That's when it causes pain. Of an extremely excriciating kind. And not physical.

That's what I recently went through - as fresh as two days back.

This "friend" empathises with me when I speak to them and the feedback I get from another "friend" is, "XYZABC said they get exhausted." Then I meet the first "friend" at a social do and the looks exchanged are all-knowing, the rolled eyes are all compassion and the hug is all warmth. And me being me, I'm repelled by that smile.

I am still reeling from the enormity of it.

All my life, at different points, different people, the same pain... and I still haven't learned.

Have you?